Last weekend, I started teacher training for Kundalini yoga.
If you don’t know what that is, the best way I can describe it is like this:
it’s a yoga practice that works to align the ten bodies of your existence for
optimal operation. Like a chiropractic practice for your mind, body, and soul.
BUT it doesn’t look like vinyasa or any other kind of yoga you might be
familiar with. There are a lot of movements of the body that are strange and
unfamiliar (arms held at 60-degree angles, for example), linked with plenty of
breath and breathing patterns. If you’re curious, google it – I’m sure my
description is not doing it justice. The bottom line is this: if you’re open,
the practice is transformative – in difficult ways that, in the end, pay off in
bliss. (I know: I sound like a total yogi dork with my New Agey talk, but trust
me on this. I’ve experienced it first hand.)
That said, opening training weekend was a doozy.
But the perfect storm was already set up for me. My kiddos
were all fighting mild colds. My emotional stress was high because of the Me
Too movement & talk of sexual assault and harassment on social media. Which
then set off an episode of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Then add Kundalini to the
mix? It was inevitable.
For clarification: my experience of Kundalini yoga usually
results in a humming of the body; my vibration is elevated. The first day of
training wasn’t really training like I expected. I was expecting some lectures
& discussions of the science of yoga & Kundalini, maybe some readings
of sacred yogic texts. But nooooo. It was an extended Kundalini practice. Morning session was about 4 hours.
Then another 2-3 hours in the afternoon. My body was on overload. During the
lunch break, I went to run a quick errand & sat in my car for a while,
contemplating not going back. Then I went to the field across the street from
the yoga studio and lay down in the grass for a while.
I was freaking out.
But I couldn’t explain why or even articulate what I was
freaking out about. I just knew that something was happening in my body. And by
association, something was also happening in my mind and spirit.
Still, I mustered up what I needed to finish out the day’s
“training”. After all, I’m not a quitter. (Hello, Asian perfectionist girl.) The
next morning? I couldn’t go to 4:30am sadhana – a 2-1/2 hour meditative &
physical practice. Nor endure another 8 hours of “training” (if that’s what
awaited me). My body was shot. I ended up sleeping all through Sunday until the
next morning. About 24 hours or so.
The rest of the entire week, my body was low-key humming
intermittently.
According to astrology and other sciences: we are entering the
Aquarian Age (yes, just like the song). We just left the Age of Pisces, the time during which we are given information
and, from that, we establish our belief system, our faith. The Age of Aquarius?
It’s the age of experience; that what we experience directly informs our
beliefs and faith, rather than knowledge told to us. Now, I’m not going to get
into all the details of this, though it is fascinating! You can go do your own
research. I’m only pointing this out because it helps me understand some of
what has been going on in my life.
Go ahead. You can write me off as some crazy New Age weirdo.
I don’t mind. Sometimes I call myself that! Haha! But I know what I know
because I experienced it firsthand.
And I know I didn’t make that shit up. I know it wasn’t a product of my
imagination. How? Because some of the things I’ve experienced and witnessed
aren’t even in my brain. And if I were to explain it to you, dear reader, it
would sound totally generic. As in “yes, yes – I know exactly what you’re
talking about because I have also felt this way.” But no. You haven’t felt this
way – not like this.
Let me give you a brief example: in one instance, I had a
moment when I found something abstract that I didn’t even know I was looking
for. If I were to say this to someone (and I have), their response is: oh yes – I know exactly what you mean.
Like it happens all the time. Does it? Do people find something they didn’t know
they were looking for until it came into their lives? (And no, Target doesn’t
count. Haha!) I don’t know. Not the thing that I experienced. It was startling.
And if something like that happens all the time, then why the heck aren’t more people
talking about it??
This one time I experienced such high vibrations in my body
that I could’ve sworn, had I continued the practice just a few minutes longer,
I’d probably be levitating. No joke. Not like superpower flying. Maybe a quarter-inch
off the ground. But still. It was nuts. I sound
nuts!
I considered dropping out of training. It was that intense.
Do I want to subject my body, mind, and soul to that level of intensity? For
the next TEN MONTHS?! WTF.
Of course I do. Haha – I think.
After some meditation and a really good long conversation
with my friend and spiritual teacher, the answer is yes. As long as I have
support along the way (and I know I do!), I’m in.
Deep breath.
Kundalini teacher training is going to kick my ass –both on
the physical and cosmic levels. Get ready!
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